What is the What
by Dave Eggers

The last sentence of the book is very telling of why Eggers chose to fictionalize the story of Valentino Achak Deng. I won’t spoil it for you, but I will say that the novel is worth the pain it takes to get through it. That is not an indictment of the writing, but of the strife in experiencing the story.

Deng and Eggers seem to be kindred spirits, and while each person’s suffering is their own, there is something unique in the voice of these two. Eggers finds a structure that works so well with the book that as you follow along and move back and forth between the present and the past, you become the audience to which Deng addresses throughout. Rather than address you by name, Deng addresses everyone else that crosses his path, with a quiet intensity that Eggers catches fully.

The novel is clear in its portrayal of a distinctly clear Sudanese world view, even though it is written by an American. I can’t say this with complete confidence, since I have little to compare it to, but even just from a historical standpoint, I have a much better understanding of East Africa than I did before reading the book, even just geographically. But more importantly, without getting into the big publicity push that is Darfur, I’m introduced to that of Sudan and the Lost Boys that have traveled from country to country while the government and people disregard them. This notion is captured eloquently in the title of the latest documentary on the Lost Boys, “God Grew Tired of Us.”

What is the What has the classic Eggers irony, reflection and ambivalence in character. While in AHWOSG, Eggers fought with the exploitation he thought of his parents’ death through the writing of his memoir, Deng wrestles with the same ill conscience of his people. The complexity in at once dealing with his pain and that of his people, and blaming them for their own struggles is as frustrating as the persistence God seems to have in making his life miserable.

That is why, though, the book succeeds and shines; because Deng’s character is lucid enough that the clarity and determination of his resolve is never questioned, even when he does it himself.

But sitting at work with 4 brand-new MacBooks running so pretty in front of me makes me feel like I need more things. Which is pretty difficult, seeing as I have so little income right now. We did just get a new printer (how do you find enjoyment in that? By printing everything? We don’t have paper yet, which makes that difficult) and I am typing on a fairly new iMac, so I really should just shut my trap. I’ve finally gotten tons of reading and assignments to do for class, but I actually downgraded to just two classes this semester since I’m going to be taking class during the summer, so again: Shutting the trap.

Last weekend we went to Los Angeles for CIA’s birthday, and we played congas and dumbeks in celebration. Owl and I went down to Hermosa and she claims she had the best cupcake she ever had at Java Man — This based solely on the moistness of the cake part. It was good, I agree; the best ever? I reserve judgment. On the pier, we remembered what it was like to live there, and thought that we could live there again. Not true. Long Beach, maybe.

I finished What is the What right before we left, and I worked on a review for about an hour and now it’s just been collecting dust on the virtual shelf that is Wordpress, along with a 12 song list of music from 2006 that I had intended on sharing, but now am feeling stupid for not having finished before, say, the end of last year.

Regardless, I felt I needed to check in, because I hadn’t in a while. I hope everyone’s doing fine! Or Great!

If you knew the guy the Mariners just traded for, Vidro would slug almost a full .100 less than Snelling, would you still make the trade? Baseball Prospectus’s PECOTA projections are out, and that’s what they say. I’m not saying they are infallible, but I am saying they are fairly reliable. It’s mostly what I use for my fantasy teams, and that’s given me consistent finishes, for the most part since I started using them. Paired with a good draft and serious activity on the waiver wire, it is pretty much guaranteed to keep you in at least the top 5 for most of the season. Just like Billy Beane, though, that shit doesn’t work in the playoffs.

A couple of exceptions: If I remember correctly (I don’t have last year’s Prospectus in front of me), PECOTA predicted Adam Dunn’s weighted mean for batting average to be about .265 or so. He came in at .234 — All the other numbers were pretty on though. This year’s projection is a similar number.

Who to target this year? Well, I’m not going to get into it just yet, mostly because it’s a more involved process than that, and I may have something brewing that is a more appropriate venue for that. I’ll keep you posted, though.

Anthony Bourdain visited the Northwest on his most recent episode of No Reservations, and it was a nice little reminder of all that is great (well, not all) about the Northwest. He went to Voodoo Donuts, the Velveteria, Apizza Scholl, took the underground tour, and went camping at Lost Lake with the Chef from Heathman Hotel before he headed up to Seattle. I learned a little bit about the Portland Underground, which is rather different than Seattle’s — People would get “shanghai’d” in Portland bars, locked in cells underground and then shuttled into boats as shipmate-slaves to Shanghai. Supposedly they took your shoes off before they put you in the cell and they covered the ground with broken glass to prevent escapees. Bourdain was fairly amused by this, but concludes that his tour guide has “spent a little too much time underground.” I concur.

In Seattle, he visited Pike Place, had a meal with Gypsy Dinners, ate some geoduck (pronounced, goo-ey duck, for you non-northwesterners), and of course, went to Salumi.

At Pike Place, Bourdain went to Piroshki, Piroshki — Noah and I used to eat there on occasion when I worked downtown. The Piroshki is best fresh, like anything, right? We usually had dessert there. He also went around the area and ate food from the vendors; it seemed like everyone was offering him everything. He also visited Beecher’s, which has some good but maybe overrated Macaroni and Cheese, but it is neat to watch them shuffle the cheese curds around that huge tub.

The Portland half was better than the Seattle one, partly because the food looked better and more accessible to viewers like me — Not eating fancy feasts at Gypsy Dinners, but more likely starving in a line for a sensible and cheap meal. The scene at Salumi was great though, and a good way to end the episode. If you’re looking for more about Seattle, the Amateur Gourmet is wrapping up his review of it, which includes some of the good places from Bourdain’s visit plus much more.

Check out the Season Two clips episode if you get the chance, watching Bourdain complain about the producers, who are relentlessly asking him to do promos, is a riot and shows that while he may have a great job, it’s probably still a pain in the ass at times.

11? Seriously?

The cold has finally come into town, but I hear that El Nino is the reason we’re experiencing such dramatically warm weather (and I suppose that Global Warming thing has something to do with it). Now that Global Warming has become so exposed to the world, I’ve found it invoke more and more jokingly — I know I do it all the time. I imagine it will also cause more disputes at home. When we were at the BBG when it was 70 degrees, we heard a couple arguing about it:

“This is nice weather though.”
“I don’t know want to talk about it anymore.”

It’s been a ridiculously long break for me, and I’m having trouble getting back into the swing of things, and it usually happens around this time that I start feeling guilty about not writing about Things. We missed the Golden Globes the other night, they kind of just snuck up on me. Glad Borat won, though.

Let’s see, what else, oh yeah, Obama established his exploratory committee for president. It seems like the dearth of Presidential Hopefuls we had in 2004 will be a distant memory when we have Barack Obama, Jon Edwards, and Hillary Clinton all vying for the Dems nomination. Exciting!

The year-in-review of burgers still has Father’s Office burger still at the top of the pack, which is surprising to me, since there was good food in Los Angeles, but I would think that these other places would give them a good run for the money. Still, though, I had some good burgers, and some just okay ones. Here’s the rundown and the ratings, from least preferred to most (I say least preferred, because most of the time, my fat ass will take a burger over most anything else, even a crappy one).

10. Big Nick’s Burger and Pizza Joint – I had some not so spectacular things to say about this place, and to top it all off, it’s all the way on the Upper West Side, which makes it a not very good destination eatery, though if I ever find myself hungry, it’s past midnight, and on the Upper West Side, I’ll go in again and find something to eat of their enormous menu.

9. Goodburger – I also had not very many nice things to say about this place, and that mostly has to do with the bland burger meat and unripe tomatoes. I thought maybe the Black & White Shakes they had would make up for them during my first visit, but when we went there a couple months ago, they were nothing special. The fries, too, were like McDonald’s: thin-cut and lightly salted. Normal and boring.

8. Sliders – One of the few burger places I’ve visited in the city (of San Francisco), the best thing about this place is the rotating grills they have to cook the patties. Basically, it looks like a grill is placed on a spindle and it just rotates at a constant rate so the cook can flip them more easily. I really don’t know why it’s necessary, and it’s not as if it makes the burgers any better than anywhere else, but I thought it was funny. The burger itself was inconsequential; they had a condiment bar, which usually means the tomatoes are sitting out all day, and the lettuce is a soggy lump. Not entirely so here, but the sesame seed bun was tedious and the meat was overcooked. The bacon was not soggy, but still couldn’t save this burger from mediocrity.

7. Schnack – We gave this place a few different tries, the first of which I went alone. I’m finding it pretty hard to figure out why everyone loves their burgers so much, as you can tell from the picture, it’s pretty meager, and it feels weird to pay for your burger by the cent — Lettuce and tomato is $.60, mayo another $.65. The “best deal” burger is something I’ve never had, but I’m willing to go back and give it a try: Quad (that’s right, 4 patties), American Cheese, bacon, lettuce and tomatoes. The fries are good, a hefty basket and a good amount of spice to them. There are also a few other oddities on the menu of which I haven’t had the chance to try yet, including their famous beer shakes, which sound remarkably wrong and disgusting — But I’ll try anything a few times. I’m stupid like that. Remember that time I ate chicken feet?

6. In-N-Out – This is the other California place I always go to. Did I tell you that when we had a stopover on our way to New York this summer, we stopped in Oakland and Los Angeles and both times I had my very awesome family bring us In-N-Out? Actually, in Los Angeles we changed our connecting flight and stayed the night and had some. It’s that good, and it’s damn cheap. The fries are unique to the chain, which isn’t saying much, but they’re particular and part of the package, like red pepper flakes on pizza, natch. Next time, maybe Zuni Cafe will get thrown in the SF stop, but we’re going to LA in a couple of weeks, and you better believe In-N-Out will be one of our visits (though I would forgo that for Father’s Office, just to see if the burger lives up to the hype in my head). One of the best things about this burger is the grilled bun.

5. Gavroche – A small little French “country-style food” restaurant in the West Village, Gavroche has a brunch that serves that thick slab of meat you see there. The burger was a tad overcooked, but the cheese was superb and the bun firm and a little greasy, which has some sort of sick allure to me. There’s also mushrooms and sauteed onions in that stack there, which are rare for me, but did well with the Angus Beef. The frites were double-fried, and golden, though I could have used a few more on the plate. What made this place weirdly nice was the owner, Cameila Cassin, formerly the General Manager of Les Halles, taking our orders — The waiter called in sick that day.

4. Union Smith Cafe – I’ve had a few burgers from here, which is right up the street from us; nothing beats it for convenience, and the rest of the menu is safe, comfortable fare. The burgers have varied from time to time, mostly the way they are cooked, but the first time I had a burger here, I thought it was the best thing I’d eaten in Brooklyn since we got into town. Bleu cheese and bacon — and the bleu cheese was generous, which tends to overpower the rest of the burger, and it was real crumbles, not a sauce or a mixture, so it was strong; just not too strong for me. I’ll continue to frequent this place because it is comfortable and the guy we usually get to wait on us will tell us stories about the Twilight Zone ride down at Universal Florida. Also, bonus points for good and (fairly) cheap beer — the Goose Island Honkers Ale is my choice.

3. Scoop Du Jour – I don’t know how many times I have to tell people that have been living in Seattle for a long time to go here. This place kicks Red Mill’s ass up and down the street, plus you don’t have to deal with lame Magnolia and Phinney Ridge teens behind the registers, or huge crowds. And the burger is first-rate. Like I said before, there’s so many good things about this burger, but my favorite is the crispy ends of the meat, so you know it’s really actually just fried on a flat grill in its own juice, but that’s what keeps it so salty and good. This place is a Godsend on Seattle summer evenings.

2. 67 Burger – Fort Greene’s newest best hamburger shop in town. I can’t really say that with much conviction because this is the only burger I’ve had in Fort Greene, but it really is very good. The most impressive: the bacon is in bits and is extra crispy, you can see that in this pic. The burgers were cooked to true medium-rares, both times I went, and they have Bosco Chocolate Soda, which may not sound so good to some people out there, kind of like beer milkshakes, but I like it. Carbonated chocolate milk, kinda. The fries were really salty the first time I had them — curly fries like Arby’s, but the second time they were much better, no extra salt added. The staff and cook always comes around to see if everything was good, too, which is the kind of involvement I like from the proprietor. Also: first free refill, like, ever, in New York. Will be back, many, many times, I’m sure.

1. Shake Shack – The meat, oh, the meat. The fries are an acquired taste for some, but I like the crispness and the crinkle. What Shake Shack lacks in fries it makes up for in Concrete Jungles. I think that there’s something to be said about having a “season” for Shake Shack as well, even though I’d brave the cold several times a week if it were still open right now. And I’d be the dumbass eating a concrete in 20 degree weather.

This is where we were on New Year’s, right under the fireworks. We got a great spot, and arrived just 10 minutes before the show started. Here’s the finale:

I’m going to try and take the weekend to do a lot of the writing I said I would be doing this year (that means our project, Jonas) as well as a review. That may be hard though, since we plan on getting down to the Brooklyn Botanic Garden, because yes, the unseasonably warm weather is fooling those silly Cherry Blossom Trees that it’s already spring. Did I mention it’s supposed to be 70 tomorrow? And I was looking forward to some snow. Damn you, Global Warming.

I recently saw a pretty awesome interview on Sundance’s Iconoclasts program with Dave Chapelle and Maya Angelou. Actually, I had originally had it set to Tivo Hamburger America, because I wanted to know more about the Butter Burger sold at Culver’s in Wisconsin (the Butter Burger Deluxe weighs in at 764 calories and 90% RDA of saturated fat). But anyway, the interview between the two was remarkable, and shows Chappelle never “lost his mind” like everyone said he did; he was just too smart to take the money and run. I couldn’t find the video anywhere because I missed the beginning, but I recommend you start Tivo’ing Iconoclasts and maybe it’ll come on again.

I’m still recovering from a nasty cold that’s been sticking to my insides like peanut butter in a jar. Luckily, I’m not working and am able to get a lot of other projects done, including finally getting some long overdue thank you cards out and sending some packages that were probably expected two months ago. Sorry, dudes. Strangely enough, I don’t get much posting done when I’m at home, which you’re just gonna have to live with, but I will give you this great Pinback song.